So, I have had some pretty life-shaking, foundation splitting, upside-down turning events happen in the last months of my life. At this point, I am not even sure if I am strong enough to really tell you what they are. That's not the point of this blog anyway.
I was lamenting to a friend about them the other day however, and she said something to me that has been an echo in my life so I thought I would heed her words. She said, "You need to write about what you are going through and feeling right now. You need to write about it because someone out there needs to hear it and if you don't do it now, you will forget what you are feeling and not be able to help them like you need to."
Wow. What do I have to say that is so profound that it could possibly help someone else out? Honestly, at this point, I feel like I have nothing to give anyone anyway. I walk around my house in the middle of the day looking around at the junk on the floor or the kids playing and think, I can't even deal with it right now. Have you ever felt this way? I know I am not depressed per se, I am just traumatized and needing a little time to figure things out. I know I will be okay and I certainly know in my head all the "Christian-eese" truths to say and cling to, but that doesn't mean I am still not dealing with the emotions of all of this. Hey, maybe this is what it means to "when you have done all else, stand"
Yeah, stand. I think I can to do that today.
So, there you go. That is how I feel today. It is not pretty. It might not even sound right, I don't know. But it is real and when I am dead and gone partying with Jesus, that is a characteristic I want people to say to describe me.
There is a song and a line in it says, "but I remember Your suffering the way that you did so I will walk through this valley if you want me to..."
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