Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Need to Breathe...

So my youngest son has croup...

So I am sitting there, with my arms wrapped all the way around his little chest, listening to my baby boy gasping for air.  He was upset.  He was sobbing....and deeply heaving his chest in and out with each labored breath.  I am trying to convince myself that the doc said he was getting enough oxygen last night so surely he still is now.....and praying that the Healer would come and do the miraculous.  And this attack just keeps going...

My other children look at me with bewilderment in their eyes.  "He is fine, we just need him to calm down and this will get better.  He sounds worse than he is."

I don't believe me.

30 excruciating minutes later, my baby boy hears the voice of his daddy on the phone and within one minute, he is relaxed in my lap with only squeaks of the attack still lingering...within another hour, he was smiling at me as I lay him down for the night.

What just happened, I ask myself?  Why is he still sick when I believed?  What is it that his body is doing to make it be this way?

Then the Lord spoke:
There are times in your life that you feel like you can't breathe.  You're sick with a swollen throat and you sound horrible.  You start to get upset.  You panic then because it feels as if  you can't breathe.  All you want is to be able to suck in that massive amount of fresh air you so desperately need but the harder you try, the worse it is.
Stop trying so hard.  Hear my voice.  I am what you need.  And when you feel like you can't breathe on your own, let me be your breath because just as much as you don't want to be this way, it almost breaks me to see it too.

Need You Now
Well, everybody's got a story to tell
And everybody's got a wound to be healed
I want to believe there's beauty here
'Cause oh, I get so tired of holding on
I can't let go, I can't move on
I want to believe there's meaning here

How many times have you heard me cry out
"God please take this?"
How many times have you given me strength to
Just keep breathing?
Oh I need you
God, I need you now

Standing on a road I didn't plan
Wondering how I go to where I am
I'm trying to hear that still small voice
I'm trying to hear above the noise

How many times have you heard me cry out
"God please take this?"
How many times have you given me strength to
Just keep breathing?
Oh I need you
God, I need you now

Though I walk,
Though I Walk through the shadows
And I, I am so afraid
Please stay, Please stay right beside me
With every single step I take

How many times have you heard me cry out?
And how many times have you given me strenth?

How many times have you heard me cry out
"God please take this?"
How many times have you given me strength to
Just keep breathing?
Oh I need you
God, I need you now.

I need you now
Oh I need you
God, I need you now.
I need you now
I need you now

Sometimes we  will get the complete healing.  Sometimes we won't.  Either way does not change how much He cares...

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